Doctor Patient Verry Funny Jokes

Patient:Doctor I Have Big Problem,I Can’t See After I Close My Eyes. I Don’t Feel Hungry After Having Food. I Can’t Sleep Until I Awake.
Doctor:Ohh… These Are Really Serious Symptoms.Go And Take Sun Bath Every Night….everything Will Be Fine.

Jokes Of The Day- Girlfriend fighting with their boyfriend

Different types of Girlfriend fighting with their boyfriend.. 

Pilot's Girlfriend : Zyada ud Matt Samjha

Teacher's Girlfriend : Mujhe mat Sikhao
Samjhe

Dentist's Girlfriend : Daant tod ke
hath me de dungi 

C.A.'S Girlfriend
Hisaab se reh samjha...

Engineer's Girlfriend : . .  . " Abey pehle Pass toh ho ja fir baat karna"

Shayari SMS Jokes Status Quotes collection

Shayari

Kabhi Mohabbat Karo Toh Hum Se Karna,
Dil Ki Baat Juba Par Aaye Toh Hum Se Kahna,

Na Kah Sako Toh Aankhein Jhuka Lena,
Hum Samajh Jaayenge Hamein Kuchh Na Kahna…

SMS

Hole Hole Dil Ka Dard Badha Hai,
Tanhai Ka Dard Athah Chada Hai,

Ab Umeedo Ki Tassliya Chhodo,
Naya Paitra Fir Se Ek Ghada Hai,

Sarangi Tanhai Ki Mat Chhodo,
Abhi Abhi Fir Uska Patr Padha Hai,

Kis Se Karna Sikwe Aur Sikayat,
Aawara Dil Par Iljaam Madha Hai,

Sadiyon Ka Sannata Mann Mein Utra,
Bechare Dil Ne Kya Julm Lada Hai…

Jokes

Hume Tumse Love Hai,
Please Refuse Na Karna,
Yeh Zero Watt Ka “Hope” Bulb Hai,
Please Ise Fuse Mat Karna.

Status

"तीन ही उसूल हैं मेरी जिन्दगी के आवेदन,निवेदन और फिर ना माने तो दे दना दन !!

Quotes

डाली पर बैठे हुए परिंदे को पता है कि डाली कमज़ोर है फिर भी वो उस डाली पर है क्यो? क़्योकी उसको डाली से ज़यादा अपने पंख पर भरोसा है !!

Funny jokes in hindi

Nani (to a kid): Soja DIPLOMA soja! 

Padosan: diploma kyo bulati ho isse? 

Nani: Meri ladki College DIPLOMA lene gayi thi, 

ye leke aa gayi..!! :D

Funny Facebook boys girls block messages

 

Facebook boys girls block messages

Why Boys get Blocked on facebook twitter
.
.
Boy: What's your Name ??
Girl: Palak and you ?
Boy: Paneer !!!
*BLOCKED!!!*
.
.
Girl: What's Up ?
Boy: Uttar Pradesh.
*BLOCKED!!!*
.
.
Girl : tu Soya hai...??
Boy : Nahi...! Schezwan hun..!
*Gets Blocked Instantly*
.
.

Girl : see ya !
Boy: Var Ram chandar ki jai !
*BLOCKED!!!*
.

.
Girl: Have a Good Day.
Boy: No thank you... I like Parle-G more.
*BLOCKED!!!*
.
.
Boy- Thank you
Girl-My Pleasure
Boy- My Bajaj Pulsar
*Reported as spam*
*Blocked Forever*
.
.
And the best one After fight:
Girl: Tum toh mujhe manaate hi nahin !
Boy: Tum kya ho? Diwali ho ? Ya Holi ?
*BLOCKED!!!

Bill Gates and Windows Funny SMS Jokes, Computer SMS

Bill Gates and Windows Funny SMS #Jokes, Computer SMS

Ek 5th class ka bacha Bill Gates ko letter likhta hai
Sir, Mujhe kuch sawal poochne hai
1. Keyboard ke letters sahi jagah nahi hai,
Keyboard ka sahi Version kab ayega..??
2. Windows Main START ka button hai, STOP ka nahi!!
3. Hum Ms-Word use karte hain,
Mr-Word kab Release hoga..??
4. Keyboard main ANY KEY ka button
Nahi to computer kyun maangta hai..??
Aakhir main ek zati Sawal
5. Aap ka naam GATES hai to aap
WINDOWS kyun banate hai..??

Search SMS Terms:

• college girls jokes
• computers sms
• hindi collage sms
• hindi funny ridles by anchor
• computer parts sayri for friends shar facebook

Funny Comedy Sms in Hindi | Aaj ki Generation

#Funny #Comedy Sms in Hindi | Aaj ki Generation 

Girl: पापा एक Important बात थी
Father:बोलो
Girl: मैं एक लड़के से प्यार करती हूँ
पर बो America मे रहता हैं
* website में हमारी जान पहचान हुई
* Facebook में दोस्ती हुई
*Skype में उसने मुझे propose किया
* Whatsapp में हम लोग दो महीने से प्यार कर रहें हैं
Father : really
तो अब
* Twitter में शादी करो
* Make my trip में हनीमून करो
* Flip kart से बच्चा मंगवालो
* Gmail में receive करलो
Last में
* अगर Husband अच्छा न लगे तो Olx में sell कर दो

Latest Kapil Sharma Jokes With Pictures, Comedy Nights With Kapil Jokes in Hindi

Latest Kapil Sharma Jokes With Pictures

Latest Kapil Sharma Jokes With Pictures, Comedy Nights With Kapil Jokes in Hindi

Comedy Nights With Kapil Sharma Hindi Jokes with image

Comedy Nights With Kapil Sharma Hindi Jokes

Comedy Nights With Kapil Sharma Hindi Jokes

Kapil Sharma Verry Funny Jokes in Hindi with Image

Funny Kapil Sharma Jokes in Hindi

Funny Kapil Sharma Jokes in Hindi | Live Comedy Show Jokes With Wallpapers

Chaloo..Santa Aur Bunta Ke Saath..Kuch Haas Le

Santa Aur Bunta Ke Saath..Kuch Haas Le

Santa Aur Bunta Bank Lootne Gaye,
Par Pistol Bhool Gaye…
Phir Bhi Bank Loot Liya

Kyoo Ke..
Bank Manager Bhi Sardar Tha.... Bola 

“Vishwas Hai Kal Tum Bandook Dikha Doge”
Santa Ke Pita USA Se Laut Aaye.
Pita :- Teri Maa  Kahan Hai?
Santa  :-  Woh Toh  Parlok Sidhhar Gayee!
   Pita  :-  Ullu, Tune Mujhe Bataya Que Nahin?
Santa :- Maine  Socha Aapko Surprise Dunga

Bunta :-  Praji Meri Dictionary Mein "IMPOSSIBLE" Word Nahi Hai..!
Santa :  Ab Bolne Se Kya Faayda?  

Jub Kharide Thi Tab Hi Check Karna Tha Na"

Santa :-  Praji Tussi Aagle Se Janam Me Kya Banna Pasand Karoge?

Banta :-  Cockroach

Santa :- Cockroach  Kyu
Bunta :-  Kyu Ke Meri Bibi Sirf Cockroach Se Hi Darti Hai

Santa Ko Apni Beti Ke Kamre Se Cigarette Ka Packet Mila..
Soochne Laga... Arre Yeh Cigrette Peeti Hai.. ?
Phir Usse Whisky Ki Botal Milee..

Socha...Arre Daru Bhi Peeti Hai ..?

Cupboard Khola..To Ek Nanga Ladka Khada Tha..
Phir Soocha. ."Hai Whayee Guru..Toh Yeh Sab Is Munde Ka Hai”

Santa Ko Koi Mobile Pe Tang Karta Tha
Santa Ne Naya Sim Card Kharid Kar Usse SMS Kiya..

Likha.. Mene Woh Sim Band Kar Diya Hai,

Ab Tu Toh Kya Tera Baap Bhi Mujhe Tang
Nahin Kar sakta

              

Oye Paaji, Apni Pregnant Wife Ko Itne Dard Mein Hospital Ki Jagah
                   Pizza Hut Kyun Le Ja Raha Ho........
Santa :-  Kyun Key Pizza Hut Mein "Delivery Free" Hai.!

Santa Ke Ghar Uske Sasural Wale Aaye,
Jasmeet :- Aaji Jao Bahar Se Kuch Le Kar Aao.
Santa  Bahar Gaya Aur Taxi Lekar Aa Gaya 

Bunta :- Oye Agar Neend Na Aaye To Kya Kia Jaaye?
Saanta: Neend Ka Intizar Karne Se Achha Hai Ki Banda So Hi Jaye

                                        

Ek Baar Exam Main Saawal Tha, "Challenge Kise Kehte Hain?"
Bunta Ne Sare Panna Khali Chod Ker Aakhri Panne Per Likha..
"Apne Baap Ki Aulaad Hai To Paas Ker Ke Dekh."

                        

Banta Rail Ki Patri Per So Gaya ..
Aadmi Ne Pucha Kya Kar Rahe Ho?...Train Aayegi To Mar Jaoge!
Bunta :- Mere Uper Se Hawai Jahaaz Guzar Gaya To Kuch Nahi Hua,

Train Kya Cheez Hai?

Teacher :- Delhi Me  Kutub Minar Hai.Bunta Class Mein Soo Raha Tha..Teacher Ne Utha Liya..
Teacher :-  Maina Kya Kaha ?. 
Bunta :-  Delhi Me Kutta Bimar Hai ..

Santa :- Yaar Meri Biwi Paani Se Bahut Darti Hai.
Bunta :- Tujhe Kaise Pata?
Santa :- Dopahar Ko Ghar Aaya To Woh Bathtub Mein Chaukidaar Ke Sath Naha Rahi Thi.

    Santa :- Raat Bhar Train Mein Neend Hee Nahin Aayee,

Upar Ki Seat Mili Thi..
Bunta :- Toh Exchange Kyun Nahin Kiya
Santa:- Arrey Praji, Kisse Kehta...Neeche Ke Seat Pe Koi Bhi Nahin Tha.

Santa  :-  Is Mirror Ki Kya Guarentee Hai.
Dukandar :-  Aap Isse 100 Floor Se Niche Girao,

Ye Mirror 99 Floor Tak Nahin Tutega
Santa :-  Wah Bhai Wah !! Pack Kar Do..!..
Jasmeet :- Lo Light Chalee Gayee..Garmee Lag Rahee Hai..
Santa :- Light Chali Gayee Toh Kya, Pankha Chalu Kar Do..
Jasmeet :- Lo! Ki Na Vahi Sardaron Walee Baat...
                Agar Fan Chalu Kiya Toh Mombatti Bhuj Nahin Jayegee...
                    

Santa Singh Ne Ek Kawa Paal Liya..

Aab Soochne Laaga..Kya Naam Raakhe ?
Kawa Bauhot Mulayam Tha..
To Sochne Ke Baad Usne Apne Kawve Ka Naam 'Microsoft'

Mi-Crow-soft  Rakh Diya.

 Santa:- Oye Puttar..Gabra Mat. Tu Sher Da Puttar Hai
 Beta :- Oye Papaji, Teacher Bhi Yehi Bolti Hai.. 

Ke Tu Kisi Jaanwar Ki Aulad Hai.
            

Suhag Raat Pe Santa Ne Bibi Ko 500 Ka Note Deke Kaha,

Humne Yeh Kam Kabhi Free Mein Nahin Kia.
BiBi Ne 200 Wapas Deke Kaha,  Humne Bhi Apno Se Kabhi Jyada Nahin Liya.

Santa Aur Jasmeet Ko Ladki Hui..

Jasmeet :-  Sunoji, Jab Yeh Badi Hogi Toh Ladke Usse Patayengey
Santa :-  Oye, Koi Gal Nahin Jassi, Maine Is Problem Ka Solution Dhoond Liya Hai.
Jasmeet :-  Kya Solution?
Santa :-  Hum Iska Naam “Didi” Rakhengey

Bunta Singh Puri Zindgi Sochta Raha,

... Sochta Raha
... Sochta Raha
... Sochta Raha
... Aur Sochte Sochte Sow Gaya Ke Agar Meri Sister Ke 2 Bhai Hai To Mere Kyu Nahi..

Nasa Mein Santa Aur Bunta Ko Chand Pe Bheja Gaya,

Rocket Uda Magar Adhe Raste Se Vapas Aaya.
....Un Se Pucha Gaya To Bole...:- Aaj Amaswas Hai Chand To Nahi Hoga.

Santa Jungle Mein Ghoom Raha Tha.. 

Pedh Par Ek Saap Latha Hua Dikhayee Diya..

Paas Gaya Aur Bola..Iss Tehra Latak Ne Se Height Nahi Badhtee..
Ghar Jao Aur Maa Se Kaho..'Complan Ya Ovaltine' Pilayee...

Bunta Aur Preeto Train Ke Liye Platform Par Khade The
Itane Me ' PUNJAB MAIL'  Aayee,
Bunta  Bhag Kar Train Par Chad Gaya...

Aur Bibi Preeto Se Bola..

Jab ' PUNJAB FEMALE'  Aaye To Chad Jaana..!

Santa :-  Parso Meri Biwi Khuwe Me Gir Gayee, Bahut Chot Lagi, Bahut Chilla Rahi Thi..
Banta :-  Ab Kaisi Hai Wo..?
Santa :-  Ab Theek Hi Hogi, Kal Se Khuwe Se Awaz Nahi Aa Rahi Hai.!

Bunta Nalke Par Paani Pee Raha Tha..

Kuch Loog Jaama Ho Gaya...
Bunta Bola:- Arrey Ab Kya Ek Sardar Chain Se Paani Bhi Naih Pi Sakta..

                 Ismein Bhi Joke Chahiye Tumhe...
                 Jaan Loge Bechare Sardaron Ki..!

                                                  (¨`·.·´¨) Always
                                                    `·.¸(¨`·.·´¨) Keep
                                                   (¨`·.·´¨)¸.·´ Smiling!
                                                       `·.¸.·´ 

Very Funny hindi Sardar Jokes and sms Chutkule

Sardar and doctor joke in hindi

Dr.:- Aapke 3 daant kaise tut
gaye..?
Sardar:- Ji wo wife ne kadak roti banai thi.
Dr.:- To khane se mana kar dete.
Sardar:- Ji wo hi to kiya tha...

Sardar and his girlfriend joke in hindi

Sardar got an sms from his
Girlfriend written as "I Miss You".
Sardar ne apna dimag laga ke 2 ghante baad reply bheja "I Mr.You".

Sardar aur ajanbi ladki hindi joke
Sardar ne 1 raah chalti ajnabi ladki se kaha:- Aapne pehchana mujhe ko.
Ladki:- Nahi aap koun ho..?
Sardar:- Main wahi hu jisko aapne
parso bhi nahi pehchana tha.
 

 Sardar and his math exam funny hindi joke

 Sardar math ke paper me dance kar raha tha.
Kisi ne pocha ye kya kar rahe ho..?
Sardar:- Yaar mere sir ne kaha tha ke her step ke no. hote h.

Sardar meets to bill gates joke in hindi

Sardar Bill gates se:- Tum pagal ho.
Bill:- Why..?
Sardar:- Tumhara surname Gates h aur business tum Windows ka karte ho.

Sardar and his wife sms jokes

Sardarni wrote a msg. to sardar:-
Ghar kab aa rahe ho. msg. karke batao.
Sardar sent msg. to her:- Nahi bata sakta msg. free nahi h.

Sardar aur kutta hindi sms joke

 
1 Sardar ne apni car ke niche kutte
ko leta hua dekha to kutte ko 1 dum se kheecha aur kha:- Bhar nikal bada aaya mechanical engineer banne.

Sardar aur chor hindi sms joke

1 Sardar ke ghar chor aa gya.
Sardar ne dekha to chor bhaga sardar uske piche bhaga aur bhagte-2 chor se bhi aage nikal gya or bola:- 1 to chori uper se humse race.

Sardar aur uski girlfriend hindi sms joke

Sardar ki G.F. romantic mood me:-
Aaj mere ghar koi nahi h, aa jao.
Sardar:- Pagal tu mere ghar aaja,
yahan hum saare h, tera dil lag jayga.

Sardar ji and his poor english joke

Sardar office ja raha tha, Patni pyaar se boli:- See u in the evening.
Sardar gusse se:- Dhamki kise de rahi h, main bhi tujhe dekh loonga.

Sardar ji went for marriage proposal hindi sms joke

Sardar kisi ladki ke ghar rista le kar gaya ladki ke maa baap bole humari beti abhi padh rahi h.
Sardar:- Koi baat nahi hum 1
ghante baad aa jayenge.

saradr dialed wrong number funny hindi text joke

Sardar ne 1 number dial kiya 1
ladki ne received. Sardar:- Hello kaun.
Girl:- Main Seeta.
Sardar:- O yaar ye to ayodhya lag gaya. Sorry Maate.

jatt khatri mulla and sardar joke in hindi

Jatt:- No if no but sirf jatt.
Khatri:- No topi no chatri sirf
khatri.
Mulla:- No gas no chulla sirf mulla.
Sardar:- No dalda no gheo punjabi sharea da peo.

Santa Banta funny hindi joke in LPG Queue:

Cylinder ki Lambi line dekh Santa gusse me bola - Abhi Sonia aur Manmohan ki Mar ke aata Hu.

Kuchh der baad wo wapas line me laga..

Banta ne puchha - Maar Di kya?

Santa - Waha Isse bhi Lambi Line Lagi hai...

15.
Sardar ki beti:- Papa kal aapke ghar se 1 member kam ho jaega.
Next day sardar ki beti bhag jati h.
Sardar:- Ladki ne kaam to galat kiya per thi wo jyotish.
17.
Sardar ke truck pe likha tha
"Chhotta Parivar, Sukhi Parivar"
msg. from "Rinku, Golu, Monu,
Ramu, Shamu, Sohan, Mohan, Tilu, Pinky de papa di gaddi".

19.
1 Bar sardar Rs. jama karne gya.
Officer:- Ye note fata hua h, dusra do.
Sardar:- Main apne A/c me jama kar rha hu, fata karu ya naya, Tujhe kya matlab h be.

20.
Sardar air hostess se:- Aapki shakal meri biwi se bahut milti h. Air hostess ne zordar thappad santa ke muh pe mara.
Sardar:- Kamal h. Aadat bhi wahi h.

21.
Sardar ne evrest pe dekha waha pe 1 baba gutka ragad raha tha.
Sardar:- Baba ye kya h.
Baba:- Masala.
Sardar:- Oh to Evrest masala aap hi banate ho.

22.
Pagal:- Tum muslim ho.
Sardar:- Nahi, main sardar hu.
Pagal:- Nahi, tum muslim ho.
Sardar (gusse me):- Haan, main muslim hu.
Pagal:- Lagte ho sardar ho.

23.
Sardar (Police station ja kar kahta h):- Mujhe phone par jaan se marne ki dhamki m il rhi h.
Inspector:- Koun de rha h.
Sardar:- BSNL wale, kehte h bill nahi bhara to kaat denge.

24.
1 Accident hua, bhut bheed ho gyi, sardar ko aage jane ka moka nahi mil rha tha. Clever sardar:- Hi. mera Bapu. Bheed ne raah di to kutta marra mila...

25.
Sardar ka sir phat gya.
Dr.:- Ye kaise hua.?
Sardar:- Main chappal se pathar tod raha tha. Mujhe 1 aadmi ne bola "Kabhi khopdi" ka istemal bhi kar liya kar.

26.
Sardar ko ek party ka invitation mila jisme likha tha only pink tie.
Sardar wahan gaya to usne dekha ke logo ne pant shirt bhi pehni thi... Hahaha

Funny Whatsapp Joke: Apni To Pathshala

 Funny Whatsapp #Joke: Apni To Pathshala

 

School☻☞ apni to pathshala masti ki pathshala......

Tuition☻☞idhr chala mai udhr chala Jane kaha mai kidhr chala......

Maths☻☞ajeeb daastan h ye kaha shru kaha khatam.......

Exam☻☞zahreeli raate ninde ud jati h........

Result☻☞dhk dhk krne laga o mora jiyara drne laga.......

Pass☻☞aaj mai uper aasma niche aaj mai aage zamana peechhe.....

Fail☻☞chhan se jo tute koi sapna jag suna suna lage.........

Jokes About Love Laugh Factory

LOVE ?

In FraNce:
its a comedy!

in GeRmaNy:
its a tRagedy!

In Italy:
its woNdeR!

In India:
.
.
.
Its a NATIONAL GAME!

Verry Funny Jokes in English

ALCOHOL contains FEMALE HORMONES

Proof:

After drinking,men gain weight,

talk unnecessarily,

Become extra emotional,

Stop thinking & start fighting over nothing

Wah Wah Wah Cid Jokes

Exam tha sar par aur bachon ne
padhna chor diya...

Wah Wah..
.
..
Exam tha sar par aur bachonne
parna chor diya..

..
.
CID KA ACP tha toilet me..
Aur DAYA ne darwaza tod diya..

Santa Banta Chutkule : Santa ki Maa

 Santa Banta Chutkule

Santa ki Maa - 20 saal tak meri koi aulad nahin hui thi.
.
.
Press reporter - Fir aapne kya kiya ?
.
.
.
Santa ki Maa - Fir main 21 saal ki hui to
.
.
papa ne meri shaadi karai.
.
Fir jaa ke Santa hua.

Chulbule Chutkule : Evolution of man

 Evolution of man:

Shadi se pehle-hero no. 1
Shad k baad- coolie no. 1

Shadi se pehle: maine pyar kiya
Shadi k baad- ye maine kya kiya?

Shadi se pehle- Janeman mat jao
Shadi k baad- jaan mat khao

Shadi se pehle- tum bin raha na jaye
Shadi k baad- tum ko saha na jae

Shadi se pehle- kuch to bolo
Shadi ke baad- kabhi chup b ho lo

Shadi se pehle- I luv you
Shadi k baad- aaj phir aalu?

Shadi se phle- milne kab aaogi?
Shadi k baad- mayke kab jaogi?

Rishta wohi soch nayi! ;

Husband Wife Chutkule Jokes in Hindi

Husband Wife Chutkule Jokes in Hindi

पति से दूर जाने के एक महीने बाद पत्नी ने अपने
पति को यह एमएमएस (SMS) किया:



याद आती है तेरी जागते-सोते,
दिन कटते हैं तेरी खातिर रोते-रोते,
काश! तुम मेरे साथ यहां होते,
कम से कम मेरे कुछ कपडे तो धोते.

Short Funny Hindi Jokes | Chutkule in Hindi Font

Short Funny Hindi Jokes | Chutkule in Hindi Font
पति-पत्नी के मजेदार किस्से

संता: तू अगले जनम में क्या बनना चाहता है ?
बंता: मैं अगले जनम में चूहा बनना चाहता हूं.
संता: क्यों !
बंता: क्योंकि मेरी बीवी इस दुनिया में केवल चूहों से ही डरती है.